I have soooooooo many homework to do :( I just finished my Japanese kanji homework... But still, tons to go... I'm glad that I managed to participate and provide correct answers to some questions during [CS1102] Data Structures and Algorithm tutorial on Thursday. I must really get that 5% participation mark! XD

Did workout today... Hmm, this is week 3, and I still manage to do at least 3 days of workout a week (reminder: no lab for now XD). Today I was focusing on pectoralis major (and uh, minor as well) and triceps. Pecs is the hardest (the only hard?) muscle I've got; well, thanks to push-ups and stuff. :) But I'm also wondering why my calf muscles are quite well-developed, even though I haven't been running for at least 3 years. Hmm...

And uh, suddenly I feel like going for cycling. The last time I did was like... Last year? XD Ohhh, I've never seen an electric bicycle right before my eyes. Maybe I should ask my uncle whether he has one??? XD

Whew, Week 3 is approaching... That means tutorials will start next week. Argh... Busy busy busy...

Here is my timetable...

I've reached Singapore, safe and sound.

Surprisingly, I managed to clean up my room and put all my stuff in order in one day. :) My room is as clean as ever hahaha...

My mom sent me a message a few hours ago. She said that her husband disturbed her again, especially after I have left. Gosh, I really don't know what to do. Well, my mom said I shouldn't think about it... Well, I don't want to think about it but of course I can't just forget it, right? But hmmm, once school starts, I think I will be very busy. Anyway, till this very day, I always sms my mom at least once everyday, just to make sure that I'm ok (physically and emotionally) and she is doing fine.

Yesterday my mom made me a nice dessert from avocados and strawberries, two of my favourite fruits. Whew, alright, I know she is going to survive so I shan't worry. I have my siblings to take care of her.

Good night.

Whew, I'm tired of bidding. I've planned to take 7 modules next semester, and I've actually prepared a nice timetable for myself. Again, I shall remind myself that I've rejected an offer from Oxford because I want freedom of choice; that's why I choose NUS. So yea, I shan't complain.

Will I be able to get all the 7 modules I want to read, which span from various departments within the Faculty of Science to the School of Computing to the Centre for Language Studies?
- [CM1111] Basic Inorganic Chemistry (Department of Chemistry, Faculty of Science)
- [CM1121] Basic Organic Chemistry (Department of Chemistry, Faculty of Science)
- [LSM1401] Fundamentals of Biochemistry (Department of Biological Sciences, Faculty of Science)
- [GEK2506] Drugs and Society (Department of Pharmacy, Faculty of Science)
- [GEM2900] Understanding Uncertainty and Statistical Thinking (Department of Statistics and Applied Probability, Faculty of Science) OR [CS2100] Computer Organisation (Department of Computer Science, School of Computing)
- [CS1102] Data Structures and Algorithm (Department of Computer Science, School of Computing)
- [LAJ2201] Japanese 2 (Centre for Language Studies)

Just wondering, how do you get your modules in your university?

In NUS, we use this system called CORS (Centralised Online Registration System). It is, in a way, similar to an auction. For example, in this round (2A), I am bidding for GEK2506 and GEM2900. Here are the bidding summary on Thursday, 7 January 2010 (12.36 pm). By the way, round 2A closes at 5.00 pm today.

[GEK2506] Drugs and Society
Vacancy: 290
Number of bidders: 282
Lowest bid point(s): 1
Highest bid point(s): 2743 (crazy, sia...)
My bid: 250

[GEM2900] Understanding Uncertainty and Statistical Thinking
Vacancy: 500
Number of bidders: 593 (!!!)
Lowest bid point(s): 1
Highest bid point(s): 2385
My bid: 200

Ahhh, dog-eat-dog society...

So yea... The system will close at 5.00 pm today, counting the lowest successful bid points and subsequently eliminating each student who made a bid less than the lowest successful bid points.

Last semester I was very lucky as I managed to get all the 6 modules I wanted with no (little) problems.

The norm is actually 5 modules per semester... But yea, I don't want to waste my undergraduate years so I shall take up more modules so that I can learn more things!

Below is my Semester 1 timetable... The only thing I hate is the long Chemistry laboratory hours (from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.). And well, it will continue for the next 3.5 years till I graduate with a B.Sc (Honours) in Chemistry XP

There is always a limit for everything.

There is no such thing as unlimited patience.

Ok, before I mention my new year resolution, let's take a look at last year's resolution... Actually, I kinda forget my resolution, so I have to refer to my old post XP

-----2009 RESOLUTION-----

1. 4 x 100 diamond push-ups everyday (upgraded from last year - 3 x 100)
2. Be a good relief (Chemistry and Electronics) teacher
3. Practice violin consistently in order to take diploma next year
4. Get into the Dean's List in NUS XD
5. No fighting with my dad for the whole year (I've never been able to fulfil this one...)

1. FAILED: Only managed to do 4 x 100 during the holidays. Impossible to do during hectic school days. And I'm still wondering why JC teachers keep saying that 1st year university is slacker than the A-level days.

2. CLEARED: Hmm, I think this one should be alright... :)

3. FAILED: I haven't touched violin for ages and OMG... It's coming!!!

4. UNKNOWN: The faculty hasn't released the list... There is hope!

5. FAILED: No comment. Failure happens every year and I'm not going to make the same resolution again from now on.

Yes, I suck... I was aiming too much.

-----2010 RESOLUTION-----

1. Be more muscular.
2. Earn distinction for violin diploma exam.
3. Get into the Dean's List in NUS, Faculty of Science for Semester 2 and 3.
4. Complete at least 25% of my unofficial (fan-made) remake of Breath of Fire I.
5. Keep in touch with everyone, especially my dearest RJ 08S03O classmates!
6. Spend less money on food.
7. Do more community service.
8. Tell this person an important thing.

I shall clear at least three of these... Hopefully... XD

As I have said earlier, I consider myself to be fatherless out of my own will. No, I haven't had the willingness (yet) to forgive my mom's husband (let's call him X; I cannot bring myself to mention 'my dad' at this point of time) but I believe there will be one day when I can forgive him. I'm sincerely waiting for harmony to be restored in my family.

I had quite a bad headache yesterday. However, I pushed myself to come with my mom and X to a Buddhist temple located pretty far away from my house because deep down in my heart, I knew I wanted the real X to come back. As usual, X didn't want to drive, so my mom had to drive the car. Obviously my mom wouldn't allow me to drive because it was already late (10 pm) and the road was kinda rocky due to construction near the vicinity. Well, the reason why we eventually decided to come to the temple was due to the fact that we wanted to avoid another fight. We have been fighting night and day (night being the worst time of the day because all of us wouldn't be able to sleep because of all these matters).

Oh yes, before I continue, I'm so sorry I can't disclose my family problems because well, some things are best kept personal. If you have followed my previous posts, perhaps you can sort of have a rough idea at what the problem(s) is/are? Well, I can only say that there is something wrong, something unusual with X. At first, I thought he had gone mad that he had to be sent to a mental institution (or perhaps he was cursed by some kind of black magic)... But well, perhaps I was wrong, afterall...

The chief monk of the temple is my grandpa's friend. My mom told me a story before: when I was about 3 months old, I was brought to the same temple I stepped my foot onto last night. Why? It was because I couldn't sleep at all at that time. Every night I kept crying and crying and crying as if I was possessed by some kind of evil spirit. Apparently, after my mom brought me to the temple, I was able to sleep, as my mom told me.

We met the chief monk to ask for help. As his wife told us, he could neither speak nor write in Chinese. However, when he wanted to communicate with God, he was able to speak and write in Chinese with ease. Yesterday was the night when I saw for myself how the supernatural forces were used so that we could directly 'meet' and communicate with God. The chief monk spoke to X and my mom, delivering the words of God. Although he didn't speak to me directly at all, I could sense the presence of God. God said to me, "You have to control your emotion. Don't hurt Wang Yung Lung (X's name, not too sure how to write it in Chinese characters) anymore." After the ritual was done, the chief monk gave my mom 2 pieces of paper which had been written with some illegible Chinese characters and sprinkled with wine. One of them should be burned outside our house, and the other one should be burned for X to drink.

The temple was very beautiful with all the huge, adorable statues. It was ornately designed, and the huge lanterns that illuminated every corner of the temple gave the atmosphere almost a golden red hue. The aroma of the joss sticks wafted through the air, lingering on my nose as it gave a soothing effect (oh how I love its aroma!). It was very quiet and peaceful there I could perfectly hear the sound of my heart beating. I experienced an unbelievable thing when I got back home at 2 o'clock in the morning. I was contemplating in the main hall of my house when my mom was burning the first piece of paper in the garden. For a moment, the usually daunting tick-tock of the grandfather clock seemed to pose no threat to my undisturbed peacefulness of mind and soul. Time seemed to stop flowing and for once, home didn't feel like hell. And the most unbelievable thing was... All of us could sleep peacefully last night. I didn't wake up at all till 8 o'clock this morning, which was VERY surprising considering the fact that I will always wake up once the sun starts shining (at 6 o'clock here in Jakarta). Normally, even when I slept at 4 o'clock in the morning, I will wake up when the sun shows its face.

Well, honestly I'm not familiar with Buddhism even though my mom and X are Buddhist, especially so as I've spent 13 years in Catholic schools (2 years in St. Bernadette Kindergarden, 6 years in St. Laurensia Primary School, 3 years in St. Laurensia and 2 years in St. Joseph's Institution [Secondary]). Just an aside, now if I think of it, should I go to Catholic Junior College instead of Raffles Junior College, I would have spent all of my pre-university education days in Catholic schools! Well, back to our track... I believe that there is only one God. Religion is just a means for one to communicate with and worship God. I believe in anything and everything that is holy. I fully believe in the monk's words of wisdom, the pieces of paper that the chief monk gave, and of course, the voice that spoke to me during my visit to the temple.

One thing I have to be honest to myself... I've never received a direct manifestation of love from a father before... No congratulations, no praise, nothing from a figure of a dad. This is the reason why I'm ok living without a dad. Mom is my pillar of everything: hope, strength, love, you name it. But well, of course it's better to have a harmonious family where all the members are present, right?

I don't know if anyone notice this but I've changed my name in Facebook from 王宗成 (Wang Zong Cheng) to 劉宗成 (Liu Zong Cheng; Liu is my mom's surname). It was done at the peak of my sickness of X. I'm not going to change it for now. No, this is not about vanity. As I have mentioned earlier, I just cannot re-accept X as my dad for the time being... Oh, I'm leaving the gist of the problem till the end of this entry. The chief monk said that X was fine physically and mentally. However, he was emotionally unstable. He created a layer of evil within himself which was the reason why he disturbed my family. There is nothing that can be used to cure him; God can only help. The most important thing that X has to do is... He has to exorcise his personal demons ON HIS OWN. I will give him time, and I really hope he will accomplish that. Should the time is up, I'm sorry but I'll never ever consider him as my dad.

I will pray, wait and see...

It took Cliffy quite a while to gain access to her result because NUS WebVPN because the network was jammed. Only later she realised that she could try using SoCVPN, and hey, it worked! Thanks to CS1101 which has given her access to SoCVPN.

Ok, shall be honest with herself...

[CM1101] Principles of Modern Chemistry (4 MC)
Grade obtained: A+

"I'm putting so much hope on CM1101!" (Cliffy, NUS: Semester I prospects..., 1 December 2009) Thank God, Cliffy is able to score an A+ for this module. More importantly, this shows that Cliffy is able to grasp the concepts of modern chemistry (especially molecular orbital theory which is the very foundation of Chemistry in today's world). So Cliffy, please don't throw away molecular orbital from your brain because it is definitely important for higher level compulsory modules especially when we learn spectroscopy later on.

[CM1131] Basic Physical Chemistry (4 MC)
Grade obtained: B+

No comment, but glad that Cliffy did not fail this module. Hate physical chem. so much...

[MA1421] Basic Applied Mathematics for Sciences (4 MC)
Grade obtained: A-

A- is (sorry) kinda disappointing. Cliffy must have done lots of careless mistakes in the final exam. But whatever... No more pure maths for the rest of her life!

[CS1101] Programming Methodology (5 MC)
Grade obtained: A

Satisfactory. One of the most interesting modules taken.

[PC1328] Life as a Complex System (4 MC)
Grade obtained: A

Cliffy can handle complex stuff now, hopefully...

[LAJ1201] Japanese 1 (4 MC)
Grade obtained: A+

A+ was extremely unexpected. Thanks to the teachers, especially たきぐち 先生 (not sure how to write her name in Kanji), for their and the interesting lessons they have prepared throughout the semester. This module was a stress-reliever, especially after a tough day of physical chem, save for the endless piles of homework.

Total Modular Credits (MC) in Semester I = 25
Cumulative Average Point (CAP) = 4.76/5.00

Somehow, just somehow, GPA (Grade Point Average) sounds better than CAP. LOL... XD

Cliffy is glad that she is able to secure her scholarship. More importantly, she is glad that she is given freedom of choice in NUS; she doesn't regret rejecting an offer from Oxford to study in NUS.

As stated in the FoS circular, "students with CAP of 3.50 or more will be able to select and bid up to 32 modular credits; no prior approval from the Dean's Office is required", Cliffy is thinking of reading 7 modules (29 MC) next semester:
- [CM1111] Basic Inorganic Chemistry (compulsory)
- [CM1121] Basic Organic Chemistry (compulsory)
- [LSM1401] Fundamentals of Biochemistry (compulsory)
- [CS1102] Data Structures and Algorithm
- [LAJ2201] Japanese 2
- [GEM2506] Drugs and Society
- [GEM2900] Understanding Uncertainty and Statistical Thinking

She wants to read [PR2202] Cosmetics and Perfumes but sadly it clashes with LSM1401. Literature cannot fit her timetable as well... Shall she if she can graduate with two minors: Computer Science and Pharmaceutical Science.

She has to work harder next semester. Nothing less than an A-, please? CM1111 and CM1121 should not be a problem because she likes both inorganic and organic chem (especially ORGANIC CHEM.). LSM1401 should be fine; she believes that A-level H2 Biology has adequately prepared her.

And oh... Gonna take up another CCA next semester.

Oh well, all these kinda make her forget of the unfavourable situation at home.

I declare that from today onwards, I am fatherless. It's better this way. I feel happier.

This guy, the most horrible person I have ever met in my whole life, has given me sooooooooo much pain. It's crazy. I don't care about that guy anymore. For goodness sake, can that f***ing guy stop annoying my mom!? She has been suffering so much; she even said to me yesterday that she had to endure the situation for the past 20 years! Gosh, how crazy is that!

I just witnessed how that guy annoyed my mom just now. My mom haven't had good night sleep because he kept annoying her. And just now he made my mom angry. And so I threw him out of my room (my mom was staying in my room because she couldn't stand staying in her own room).

I cannot stand this anymore. A few days before I went home (if I can ever call this place a home), my dad HIT my mom OMG... WTF! Too bad my sister didn't manage to take a video of that. She should have recorded it so that we can use it to bring that guy to jail.



Not a very clear photo, but you can see the bruise on my mom's arm, right?

I need help to bring him to jail... I am going to find a way.

P.S. This entry is written in frustration. Sorry for any grammatical mistakes.

I just received another message from my mom, saying that I have to be patient in dealing with my dad.

So, I just need to remind myself to avoid seeing him most of the time, and I guess that includes preventing myself from walking along the corridor where my dad's room is. My father rarely frequents the part of the house where my room is. And I haven't been eating together with my family on one table for ages, so I guess there's no problem.

I need to be patient... I have to be patient... And I hope my dad is not going to disturb the rest of my family members as well. He's gonna get it from me if he does so.

Come on Cliff, you can do this. You need to recharge during the holidays, NOT declaring nor getting involved in a war.

No tears, no blood today... Enough of them. I just want to share one poem which perfectly describes what I feel about my dad. There is one thing though, change all the 'she' into 'he'.

A Leave-Taking
(Algernon Charles Swinburne)

Let us go hence, my songs; she will not hear.
Let us go hence together without fear;
Keep silence now, for singing-time is over,
And over all old things and all things dear.
She loves not you nor me as all we love her.
Yea, though we sang as angels in her ear,
She would not hear.

Let us rise up and part; she will not know.
Let us go seaward as the great winds go,
Full of blown sand and foam; what help is here?
There is no help, for all these things are so,
And all the world is bitter as a tear.
And how these things are, though ye strove to show,
She would not know.

Let us go home and hence; she will not weep.
We gave love many dreams and days to keep,
Flowers without scent, and fruits that would not grow,
Saying 'If thou wilt, thrust in thy sickle and reap.'
All is reaped now; no grass is left to mow;
And we that sowed, though all we fell on sleep,
She would not weep.

Let us go hence and rest; she will not love.
She shall not hear us if we sing hereof,
Nor see love's ways, how sore they are and steep.
Come hence, let be, lie still; it is enough.
Love is a barren sea, bitter and deep;
And though she saw all heaven in flower above,
She would not love.

Let us give up, go down; she will not care.
Though all the stars made gold of all the air,
And the sea moving saw before it move
One moon-flower making all the foam-flowers fair;
Though all those waves went over us, and drove
Deep down the stifling lips and drowning hair,
She would not care.

Let us go hence, go hence; she will not see.
Sing all once more together; surely she,
She too, remembering days and words that were,
Will turn a little toward us, sighing; but we,
We are hence, we are gone, as though we had not been there.
Nay, and though all men seeing had pity on me,
She would not see.

I've cried too much today; too much... I'm sick of it. I've had headache since this afternoon. Thank God today I hadn't seen blood coming out from my mouth since this morning. I'm ok, please don't worry about me. :) I want to sleep but it seems I've had too much sleep I can barely close my eyes.

First of all, I want to say sorry to everyone for causing you unnecessary worry. My blog/note is the only platform available (for now) for me to express myself; I really need to write (type) because it's the only way I can channel my feelings (I refuse to use pen and paper because I need to conserve the environment!). I would like to make it clear to everyone, including myself, that I hate my dad not only because he has hit me so many times. There are many other things that have made me sick of him, which I cannot tell here as the reasons are too personal. Trust me, I'm ok with all those hits and slaps and whatever you call them, but there are other things that have made him such a failure as a dad. And because of that, he wants others to fail as well, just like how Jamie wants Edmund to fail in LDJN (Long Day's Journey into Night: one of my A-level English Literature books).

I don't know where to start, but I have to be honest that my mom is tired of my dad. If not because of her unfailing love to him and her utmost concern towards her children, my mom would have divorced by now. I received a message from my mom a few hours ago; she said she really wanted to be away from my dad to find solace because my dad has given her so much trouble.

I am mostly concerned with my mom's situation. Firstly, no matter how much I want to deny it, she is not well. She suffers from a nervous condition which impairs her ability to walk. When it is severe, she can barely walk. Surgery is not favourable because it is too dangerous, so we've decided that she should done a series of therapy instead. She was fine when I was at home earlier this year, but nowadays she is complaining about her legs again. I really want to go home as soon as possible to see her. I can't bear to think how much pain she has to go through ever since she got married to my dad. If I can, I would slap my dad for giving my mom misery; in fact, too much.

My dad has caused pain to each and everyone of us: my mom, my brother, my sister and I. Honestly, I can easily forgive him if he did this one thing all of us have been wanting him to do (no, not saying, "I'm sorry"). Again, I cannot tell you everything because it's just too complicated. The only thing I can tell is that he has caused so much misery to all of us by not doing this particular thing. Apparently, till this very day, he has never given us chance to forgive him. Once again, I'm so sorry for being nebulous in my writing (typing) because I think it's not right for me to expose everything in this public platform.

I want to go home to see my mom badly. I don't want to go home to see my dad. In fact, my mom has given me warning to keep out of my dad's sight in order to prevent further fights. And yes, I need to listen to my mom because my mom has been a good judge all through these while. To me, she is the wisest and the most intelligent individual I've ever met in my whole life because everything that she says is always true. Several times have I tried to ignore her warning, and those resistances have caused me unbearable pain (both literally and figuratively) I dare not try anymore. Anyway, she says that she wants to move to Singapore; she can work here and send the money back home, especially for my siblings.

I can vividly recall the day when my mom told me that my dad hit me badly when I was 3 months old because I kept crying at night. That day I thought it would have been better if he hit me on my head so that I would instantly die. I'm sorry for being morbid, but that was what I thought. No worries, I'm not a suicidal person even though you might say so if you take a look at my poetry collection. I love poems related to death, destruction and the end of the world, but I have a purpose I have to fulfil in my life, and of course, I don't want to let my mom down. I can relate well with Edmund in LDJN: "I was set free! I dissolved in the sea, became white sails and flying spray, became beauty and rhythm, became moonlight and the ship and the high dim-starred sky." (Act 4) That book is just too painful... And as Mary says ""The past is the present, isn't it? It's the future, too." (Act 2), I believe that the past, present and future are inextricably linked; I can't escape. Ok, I'm not going to write a critical literary account, so don't worry.

Last week I had a nightmare. No, it's not related to ghosts, vampires or anything along those lines. I had a dream where I attended a funeral. My mom was gone... I was so shocked; it seemed so real... I couldn't stop crying that night. I... I know she will have to go one day, but please... I need more time to be with her.

Maybe I should stop ranting and take a rest to recover, shouldn't I?

PRELUDE

I hopped on a bus this afternoon on my way to Jurong Point to have lunch with my uncle. There was an Indian family sitting on the right-hand side of the bus: mom, dad and their two children. After the bus passed a few bus stops, a Chinese grandma with her grandson and granddaughter entered the bus. They sat on the left-hand side of the bus, directly facing the Indian family. Soon afterwards, I was exposed to a beautiful picture of racial harmony. The grandma greeted the two parents, saying that their children were very cute. I was sitting close to them so I could perfectly hear their conversation. I suppose they hadn't known each other before.

Along the way, one of the small Indian boys was shouting because his brother kept disturbing him. The grandma told him to stop picking on his little brother, but the boy didn't care. His father soon lost his patience, and he almost wanted to hit his son as his gesture implied it. BUT... He suddenly stopped. He lowered his hand and then smiled to his wife and to the grandma as he said "No, I shouldn't do this, right?" He then told his son to stop with an authoritative tone. Finally, the big brother stopped and returned to his seat.

The grandma and the parents then continued talking about parenting, and the grandma's grandchildren then played together with the Indian boys. The little boy even came to the grandma and sat on her lap - so cute! I couldn't help but smile; it was really nice to witness such harmony between races, and of course, between parents and children, right before your own eyes.

WHAT I HAVE TO SAY

Quoting from my own prelude above, "BUT... He suddenly stopped. He lowered his hand and the smiled..." I believe such self-control is of utmost importance in bringing up your children as it will ultimately determine your children's mindset and behaviour. And what have I experienced? Hundreds and thousands of slaps, hits, whatever you call them, from my own father. Not to forget, my father used to be a taekwondo coach and he is muscular. It's really hard for me to forgive him. In addition, I feel that my father is the most stubborn person I've ever met. I guess I've never been, and will have no chance to be able to see him eye to eye. I've been fighting with him for as long as I can remember.

After my A-level exams last year, I went home. Surprisingly, one day, my dad asked me to come to his room. We had a heart-to-heart talk! I cried, he cried... He promised that he would change, and I said that I would not be disrespectful towards him. That day I thought, "Hey, there is a beacon of hope in this abject situation." BUT... soon afterwards, the promise was broken. He reverted to the old annoying (I guess 'annoying' is an understatement) dad once again. Hope has dwindled...

I have to be honest. I'm tired, and I'm sick of him. I'm sure he's sick of myself too, but whatever. I'm going back home on 12 December, only to see my mom and my siblings. Honestly, I don't really care about him.

I know it's tough... Cliff is actually still hoping (against hope?) that his relationship with his dad will recover. But on the other hand, Cliffy doesn't even give a damn about him.

I don't know what to do. I want to cry, but I can't. I woke up at 6 pm today after taking a short nap, and felt some fishy taste of blood on my mouth. I went to the toilet, spat and saw blood smearing the white basin. Actually, it occurs to me quite often, but I'm okay. Perhaps that's the effect of a bleeding relationship.

And I better stay away from him during the holidays in order to prevent another big fights...

I am now here, alone…

No bravery, nor faith

No hope, nor confidence

No energy, nor life

This unpleasant chill

Shatters my heart

The everlasting darkness

Blinds my mind

One day, I had a family

Who welcomed, and released me

From the eternal darkness

Introduced me to reality

But they disappeared

As if it was just yesterday

Life is not that meaningful

Without their presence

Gazing blankly at the sky

A blade of grass on my mouth

Devoured by the wheel of time

Murdered by the blizzard of destiny

Exam is over!!! Time to look back and reflect on some of the things before moving on...

ESSENTIAL MODULES

[CM1101] Principles of Modern Chemistry
(5%) Mid-term exam: B+ (sigh, thanks to my carelessness...)
(5%) Assignment: ??? (not released)
(20%) Lab reports: A+, A-, A+, A+
(70%) Final exam: (expected) 86-92/100

I'm putting so much hope on CM1101! I really hope I can get an A for this one... Final exam was very manageable. But again, I was careless even on the very first question. XD

[CM1131] Basic Physical Chemistry
(10%) Mid-term exam: 60-65/100 (depends on my MCQ score which has never been released... XD)
(20%) Lab reports: A, A+, A+, B
(70%) Final exam: (expected) 63-71/100

Basic, huh? The final exam was tough; in fact it was the most difficult paper among the 6 papers I sat for this semester. I really don't know what to expect for this one. I know I won't score that well, but everyone seems to be struggling. So yea, I just hope that the bell curve can save me. XD I would be very happy if I can get a B+ or A-. And uh, I really wonder why the professors do not release our MCQ marks for the mid-term exam (they released only the structured section marks). My mid-term exam mark is either 60, 62.5 or 65 - I have checked my MCQ answers but I could not remember my answers for 2 questions, so it’s possible that I got the correct answers for these 2 questions, right? XP

[MA1421] Basic Applied Mathematics for Sciences
(30%) Mid-term exam: 85/100
(70%) Final exam: (expected) 75-82/100

This is another module with the word 'basic' attached to its title... Mid-term exam score was very unexpected. I thought I would get something below 70, but apparently the Prof. Chew was quite lenient when he marked our scripts. Well, I really hope that he will be lenient again in marking our final exam papers! The statistics section of the final exam was quite manageable; the pure maths section was so-so. Some of the questions were quite straightforward, but some were just pure nuisance.

Anyway, I just checked IVLE and discovered that Prof. Chew UPLOADED THE ANSWERS TO THE PURE MATHS SECTION!!! OMG, crazy as I was (am), I checked my answers. XD I think I would get 50-52/70. Well, I think it’s possible to get 30/30 for the statistics section! A, please? :)

ELECTIVE MODULES

[CS1101] Programming Methodology
(5%) Tutorial attendance: 5/5
(5%) Take-home exercises: 5/5
(5%) Sit-in lab 1: 98/100
(5%) Sit-in lab 2: 98/100
(5%) Sit-in lab 3: 85/100
(10%) Mid-term exam: 29/30
(25%) Practical exam: 96/100
(40%) Final exam: (expected) 63-71/80

Final exam was actually pretty easy, just that I know I did many careless mistakes. Sigh... And I was a bit disappointed regarding my sit-in lab 3 result because I used recursion (which was forbidden in the test) without knowing that the method I used is called recursion!!! Well, I really hope that the bell curve will not be too negatively-skewed (peaking on the right-hand side) so that I can get an A. :D

[PC1328] Life as a Complex System
(40%) Quiz: 49-50/50
(60%) Final exam: (expected) 39-43/50

Gosh, the final exam questions were pretty hard to answer! The questions were kind of unexpected too! As for the quiz, Dr. Max hasn't told us whether he will accept 'Big Bang' the very first question. There is quite a high chance that I can still get an A for this module. I'll pray hard!

[LAJ1201] Japanese 1
(70%) Continuous assessment: ???
- Homework: should be fine
- Lecture quizzes: 34/39
- Vocabulary quizzes: 113/120
- Listening quizzes: 51/70 (tough!!!)
- Hiragana, Katakana and Kanji quizzes: 26.5/30
- Oral test: ok; not bad, but not fantastic either
- Mid-term exam: 44/50
(30%) Final exam: (expected) 80-90/100

Just like CM1131, I don't know what to expect for this module. The breakdown of the continuous assessment is not, and will never be made known to students. Final exam was manageable, but the grammar section was quite tough! A, onegai??? XD Ahhh, I miss this module very much. I hope Takiguchi sensei will teach me again when I take Japanese 2 in the near future.

Alright, I shan't think about all of these anymore. :D The most important thing is that I am pretty sure I can secure my scholarship!

I guess I'm going to continue with my game programming... I'm going back home on Saturday, 12 December because I'm going for programming practicum next week. Our results will be released on Tuesday, 22 December.

And jia you, friends, who are still having exam (either university exam or A-level exam) this week!!!

Ah, 明日オーチャードへ寿司を食べに行きます！

P.S. Well, of course I can get lower than the expected marks hahaha XD

One more paper to go, and that is MA1421 (Basic Applied Mathematics for Sciences) on Tuesday.

Sigh, I always feel very insecure before a Maths paper. It seems like my brain can only work under exam condition :( Everytime I do a paper at home, I will get a mediocre result.

But well, no matter what happens, I think Maths was, is and will still always be one of my best subjects (even though I dislike Maths). Looking back to the old days, I scored an A for Maths exam in school most of the time. I also obtained A1 for both E-maths and A-maths, and A for H2 Maths (A-level).

I thought MA1421 mid-term paper was one of the most disastrous mid-term papers. However, I managed to get 85% XD The passing mark for the paper was 30%.

Oh well, I really hope that Tuesday will come very soon so that I won't have to worry too much.

This will be the last Maths exam I'm going to take in my whole life!!!

2009 A-LEVEL EXAM; 25 November 2009:
08.00 - 11.00 --> H2 Literature in English (Paper 3: Modern Writing)
14.00 - 16.30 --> H3 Pharmaceutical Chemistry

Heyyyy, that reminds me of something...

2008 A-LEVEL EXAM; 19 November 2008:
08.00 - 11.00 --> H2 Literature in English (Paper 3: Modern Writing)
14.00 - 16.30 --> H3 Pharmaceutical Chemistry

Wow, I can vividly recall that crazy day... It has been one year since the start of the 2008 A-level exams! XD

Digging some old photos:



One of my hobbies in JC: drawing on the white board! XD



My A-level timetable...



Gramicidin S that appeared in the H3 paper...



The three books I had to study for Literature (Paper 3)...

Alright, I guess I shall now study for Japanese exam tomorrow...

You plague me everyday with your evil rope
But you soothe me in most of my dreams
Such demonic lull carries a beacon of hope
I know not where will my thought streams

Is this fate?

Anyway, exam starts tomorrow. Let's see if you can focus.

Yours truly,
Cliffy